Wednesday, November 4, 2009

A Funny Thing Happened On the Way to the Altar

I am guessing that most people have at least one funny story to tell when it comes that special day. They probably even have a horror story to tell. Well sit back and enjoy the ride because I am about to bring you horror and comedy all in one lovely post.

Our original wedding date was set for Aug 21. That got changed for us when the ship Rich was stationed on was set to be on patrol to Alaska for two and a half months. We chose an alternate date. Shortly thereafter the ship's schedule changed and they would now be leaving at a later date. By leaving at this later date, it of course went past our second choice. Well by now the invitations had been printed. Rich said with firmness that he was not changing his wedding date for the Coast Guard again.

Aug 21 rolled around and Rich's uncle--one of our groomsmen--had been playing baseball that day. He was sliding into second and well let's just say it had an ugly end. He broke his leg. Now I can't decide if we could have prevented that from happening by keeping the original date, or would it have happened at an earlier date. He was fine, and he was coming crutches and all.

After the fateful fall of our groomsman, things seemed to move along smoothly. The dress was picked, the bridesmaids dresses were chosen. The invitations were addressed and mailed. No mistakes there. It was all in order. Then, just like on the roller coaster you reach the top of the hill and make that little turn to the right and then....

Two days before the wedding my sister flew in from in Utah. Her dress was MIA. She did not carry it on. Note to self: Always carry on the dress. My Matron of Honor and my sister in law carried theirs onto their planes. They had their dresses. While we fought with the airline(futilely I might add) we scrambled for an alternative dress for my sister. The day before the wedding my good friend and final bridesmaid came in by bus. Okay here is where it gets a little least for me. She was coming from Denver, and was scheduled to arrive in Long Beach. Instead of Long Beach she ended up going to Los Angeles. Okay, that is not the confusing part, no the confusing part is coming. Like my sister, she did not carry her dress with her. And her luggage did not arrive in L.A. with her. So where was it? Well, it was in Long Beach. Huh? Excuse me? Did you say Long Beach? Well why didn't SHE go to Long Beach then!? After taking that in, we headed back to Long Beach station.

Once we arrived at the Long Beach station, we immediately went on the search and rescue. We got no where fast. And as I recall, the people there were not only UNhelpful, they were down right rude. Someone did mention that it might be in the lost and found. Great. Let's go there and recover the dress. The person at the counter was not helpful either. Now this is where it gets a little fuzzy for me. What I remember is he was not willing to look for her one piece of luggage since there were piles of unclaimed luggage. Well, umm isn't that your job??? He practically dared me to go back there and find it myself. Oh no you didn't! This is where BRIDEZILLA kicked in. There was a little opening under the counter he stood behind. Folks, I got down on my hands and knees and proceeded to crawl through it. That's right! I CRAWLED through it! Did I mention that Rich was with me? You have to admire the guy for not backing out at the last minute. It was at this time that the security guard came. At this point, I did what I should have done in the first place. I completely turned around. I went from BRIDEZILLA to civilized human being. He escorted me and Rich to the office where we talked. I apologized for my actions, but emphasized the importance of that luggage. I was not arrested, nor was I handcuffed. In fact, we got the luggage.

So what became of my sister's dress? Well, hers was never recovered. So we did the next best thing and bought the closet match we could find. In the end, she was much happier with the replacement. It was more modest. In the pictures, the dresses I chose looked like they would be on the shoulders. They were not. Oh well.

I could also tell you about my brother-in-law trying to move our car to the front of the church and how he kept triggering the anti-theft device. In which case, the engine was cut and the horn honked repeatedly. Rich had to go out there and fix the problem. How about the coughing fit I had in the middle of the ceremony. My throat was sooo dry I couldn't even swallow. Nervous? You could say that. How about when the preacher (we were married in a non-denominational church) asked Rich to say, "and all my earthly possessions.." To which he asked, "What?"

Yes, we all have a funny tale to tell. I was inspired to share mine because of Mama Kat. You can join the fun and choose one of her writing prompts.


mormonhermitmom said...

Wow! If you two could get through that, you should be fine.

Emmy said...

Wow, you had quite a few disasters there. And sounds like there were several employees that needed a good quick kick to the shins or somewhere more painful.

Kekster's Palace said...

I remember that story

KK said...

How funny, glad you can laugh about it all now!

Mama Kat said...

I'm surprised you didn't just give up and elope!! What a story!!